Tuesday, August 5, 2008

It's Totally Acceptable

I was thinking, as I was peeing beside other complete strangers on Saturday before the Half IM, why is it totally acceptable to be doing these types of things before a competition. Not that I am complaining. In fact, they are things I have been doing for years pre-, during, and post competition. However, with some of the largest scale triathlons in the country that I have been doing lately, it is more noticeable that certain things are just fine if you are out there busting a gut amongst 2700 of your closest friends to make it 70.3 miles (or whatever the distance) as fast as you possibly can, with the most possible comfort (well, not comfort but without chafing beyond belief, doing yourself bodily harm etc.).

It wouldn't be that hard to think of a few of these things and comment on them as I write. I'm sure you will find you have done, one, all, or just many, like I have over the years.

Let's start with the easy ones!

Seven things in which it is totally acceptable to do on race day, but not in real life, so please don't try:

1. Relieving yourself (only #1's please!) on a communal bush, tree or other secluded area prior to the race

I found myself doing this twice on Saturday. The port-a-pots are not my friends, I do not like them, I do not want to visit them. I only do if I absolutely have to. I saw a whole group of men and women going to their respective "areas" so to speak, behind a small trailer on Saturday and I thought "YES!, a place to go with no lines and no stink!" I squatted right next to a girl and I though, about introducing myself first. It just seemed so, um.. personal to be going right next to her. However, I thought better of it. She might think I'm weird. I did it again prior to the first 2.1 mile run, right next to men. It's kosher to just keep your head down, and not look around. It would break some triathlete/runner code of ethics if you did. Not cool.

2. Relieving yourself on the bike

I have yet to decide if I will actually do this in Hawaii, but my coach says "just do it Kim." I just don't know that I am a serious enough athlete to take the step, relax and go, then wash off my shoe with some water. I might need that water to drink first of all. Secondly, I don't think relax & THE BIKE, go in the same sentence. I'll let you know the verdict on this one later. I certainly don't want to hold it for 112 miles, so we'll see, the jury is still out.

3. Burping, passing gas, or other outwardly loud bodily functions while racing

This one is very near and dear to my heart because I had a nice belch during mile one of the race on Saturday. I was running right next to Beth and I just couldn't even help it, it HAD to come out...like pronto. I burped so loudly that the guy in front of me turned around and said "nice one!!" I didn't know what else to say, so I said "thanks!" I mean it, you have to get that stuff out while racing. All normal courtesy bets are off.

4. Placing anything within, on or around your tri suit to stop the chafing

Sponges they hand out with water have many uses, and I have seen them used multiple ways. We'll leave it at that.

5. Jumping, yelling, screaming, crawling, rejoicing, high fiving strangers, rolling, dancing and gymnastics

Anything goes at the finish line. If you can manage to do it, always a crowd pleaser. Some people have trademark moves. I haven't developed any yet, but I am still thinking! I hope it's not crawling, I think I'll just reserve that for special occasions!

6. Bodygliding yourself from head to toe

It's expected, it's normal and no one will ever question it. I didn't use any in certain areas on Saturday and I regretted it! Believe me, for Ironman, I'm buying a vat of it and just jumping in pre-race. Anyone want to join me?

7. Taking a communal shower post-race

I did this on Saturday also even though I am pretty sure it was just for people to get cooled off after the race! I had no other plan, and I was NOT riding 7 hours home in a car smelling like I did after that race. I brought my shampoo, conditioner and just soaped up right there. I caught a guy watching me at one point and I must have looked surprised. After I walked away he said, "Thank you for that" and I said, "um.. you're welcome?" I knew what he was getting at, and even though it was kind of gross, I my day was just too good to let anyone bring me down or even be negative for one second. Whatever, I was fully tri-suited (well bathing suited) and that was fine with me.

Here's a pic of the shower! Good clean, fun!

Hope you enjoyed the list! I've got to go lift! Feel free to add in the comments section. I'm sure there is more!

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